Happy Birthday Singapore!

At the Tokyo Orientation, a JET alumni told us in our first month or so here in Japan, we would suddenly feel so so alone and start missing home dreadfully. His moment was when he was alone in his own apartment for the first time, unpacking his luggage, and he suddenly felt the weight of the situation bearing down on him and he started bawling his eyes out.

I thought my moment was over, having been all stage 2 culture shock and everything last week in Tokyo. But NO.

My moment just happened. The stars were aligned and all that, of course, today being National Day and all, and stupid me decided to watch National Day song videos on Youtube.

First up: There are 5 stars arising. So far so good, I was strong. Yeah, I was good. Then, I thought, hey, what's this year's NDP song? Found it on youtube. Who sang it? Sylvia Ratonel. Ok, she's a pretty good singer. Let's hear it.

I have a dream of starting a life
I have a hope, a flame alight
This is the moment, freedom is calling
This is my start, a new beginning

So far so good. Haha Sharon Au acting as 1960s woman, haha. Wah! That's Timothy Nga as her son. Ok, next stanza.

I have a heart, it beats for you (I started bawling here)


A step at a time, our spirit renew (First tissue)


Living together under the sun (Second tissue)


Our hearts will beat as one (Third tissue)

In a heartbeat, I’ll be there for you (Fourth tissue)


In a heartbeat, no one else will do (Fifth tissue, eyes swollen, gasping)


In a heartbeat, we will always be (Sixth tissue, hiccups set in)


Together, united; you and me (Seventh tissue, it's positively heart-wrenching)

And so on and so forth. I have NEVER cried like this. :( I carried on for the entire song, and wailed even harder when I watched the video for This is Home Truly. This version: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxo4HgJK6yo&feature=related

Whenever I am feeling low


I look around me and I know


There's a place that will stay within me


Wherever I may choose to go


I will always recall the city


Know every street and shore


Sail down the river which brings us life


Winding through my Singapore

Of course I WAILED at the part 'There's a place that will stay within me / Wherever I may choose to go'. Like someone twisted the knife in my heart.

I know, what a wimp. But when you're all alone, in a foreign land, I'M ENTITLED. lol

Just so you guys know what to expect when/if you go on the JET program. Alrighty... now to bathe (and maybe cry some more) and then to watch the live broadcast of NDP 2011.

Home is where the heart is. And my heart is in Singapore.